Ben

This is cute huh?

Plethora of Pictures

So I guess I owe you all a post. Monday was my first day back to work. BOO. It was one of the hardest days ever for me. I hated to leave Ben at the daycare and realize I wasn't going to get to be with him all day everyday like I have been the last 8 weeks. It also meant that he wasn't going to be with me like he has been for the past like 10+ months (which sounds like the same sentence twice, but I meant the kid has either been IN me or NEAR me for that long!). Luckily he's pretty much in the next building over. There's technically a parking garage between us. So I will pretty much go over there whenever I can... Monday I went over during my lunch break yesterday and just held him. Tuesday I took him with me to get my lunch. I snuggled a little with him too. I'm so glad he's near by. I hope the ladies at the daycare (Kinder Care) are taking good care of my little guy. Luckily (even though I'm still paying for daycare) Delinda is going to watch him once a week. I'm so grateful for that because he'll be home and with family. The only downside to it is that I wont get to see him at lunch.

Here he is on his first day.

Last week while we were getting ready for our walk I had Ben in his car seat to put in his stroller and Ally all leashed up. She doesn't move if you've got her on the leash, even if you're not standing with her. So I left the two of them to get something from the family room looking like this... and came back to find Ally standing in his car seat (just take the way she's standing in that picture and put her on top of his legs). I of course freaked, and grabbed Ally out of his seat and found this. My poor baby! He was crying, but I think it was because I was! I was pretty much hysterical, but he was bleeding and it scared me and I was REALLY ticked at Ally. His scratch got a little angry that night, but it's already gone thank goodness. He's a tough cookie, he only cried for just a minute and I'm pretty sure he was crying mostly because I was! And he's okay. And so am I... now! :) And we're pretty sure she wasn't doing it to be mean to him, it might've been she thought she needed to be in there with him too!

Ben and I always have a good time at the changing table. When he was first born he HATED having his diaper changed, now he really likes it. He fusses when he's got a dirty diaper so I think it just must feel so great to have it changed. Plus it's a good time for us to talk and smile at each other. I had my first experience of being peed on by the little fella the other day! It was quite humorous. Unfortunately I didn't have my handy-dandy Pee-Pee Teepee's available that Cecilia got us... so I had to use a burp rag that was there. I've been waiting for that to happen.... it finally did- and two days in a row! The second time we were able to get the teepee in time!

Another event was I got my hair cut and colored last week. It felt so nice to get spruced up, especially before I had to go to work. I've looked pretty hammered lately I'm fully aware. Ryan wasn't so happy about the cut though because I chopped 3 inches off, but man does it feel good! And really, you can barely tell a difference in my opinion.

Before
After (I know, aren't I sexy! ha, ha)
We just bought tickets to go to Utah next month! We are going out so I can take pictures for my cousin Ann's wedding. She's getting married in Idaho, but we decided to make it a trip so my other siblings can meet Ben, and our friends too. I'm hoping to make a day trip up to the Uintas, I really really miss them and I think Ryan would love it there as much as I do. I want to go fishing too, it's been SO long. Overall it'll be an expensive trip I'm sure, but I'm excited.

We had some friends over for dinner the other night. They have a little girl that was born just two or so months before Ben. She's twice the size of Ben already, I'm not sure when he'll catch up though- he's too tall and skinny! Here's a pretty cute picture of them.

And now just some CUTE random pictures of our boy. We seriously scored in the cuteness factor with him! I think he takes after his daddy! Check out his cute New Balance shoes in the last picture! Thanks to Megan and Cony!

Nice Long Walks

We are really blessed to live where we do. Not only do we have a cute house, but we live in a great clean neighborhood that is near just about everything and anything. We have the mall about 10 mins away and on the same road it's on, there's EVERYTHING. Target, fast food restaurants, Petsmart, regular restaurants, two movie theatres, Best Buy... seriously... everything. And if it's not there- it's somewhere else near us. Church is only 10 minutes away, the temple and my work are about 20-25 minutes (with out traffic) away. Ryan's work is a bit further... that's the only part that stinks. And the airport and downtown are a ways away- but we don't really venture down that area too often for it to be a hassle. One of the perks to living in our neighborhood is the Big Creek Greenway. It's a large park that has a lot of biking and walking trails and sort of a nature preserve with boardwalks, oh and a Big Creek! There are mountain biking trails and swamps and little ponds and a great field to play frisbee or soccer in... it's BEAUTIFUL. We are lucky to have an entrance in our neighborhood just right up the road from our house. SO... in an effort to get back in to shape and loose some weight Ryan and I pinky swore that we would go there three times a week. He bought a bike and I have Ben's little jogger stroller so I can walk (hopefully eventually run) and Ally tags along with us. It's good for her to get the exercise too. I really enjoy the time there. It is like a little heaven away from the city pretty much right in the middle of it. Tall trees (which for those who have never been to Georgia, there are a lot of) and the vines and we often get to see wildlife in there. It really not only does good things as far as health wise, but mentally too. It's so quiet and peaceful and it reminds me why I'm such a nature girl at heart. Anyway, I took some pictures and wanted to share how beautiful it is there. We went this evening and the sun coming through the trees was just beautiful and perfect and serene. The weather couldn't have been any better either. It was just what I needed today.

Please Don't Take My Sunshine Away

Had my postpartum doc's appointment today. Everything is great! In fact, I lost 21 lbs since I had the baby. It's also less than what I weighed before I got pregnant too! Crazy! I don't say this to brag, I say it because it's exciting for me. And a HUGE surprise. I really didn't think that my body would handle pregnancy so well. I was prepared to be dealing with some pretty crazy weight issues and other things from it all. Now, I just need to keep it up. I'm sure a lot of it had to do with losing 11 lbs my first trimester and really not gaining it back and also having the Gestational Diabetes and having to watch my diet. I haven't done really GREAT with my diet since I've had Ben, but I've been a whole lot more careful with what I eat. So that was my good news today. I also just woke up from a successful hour nap with my Ben who is still sleeping. That was pretty sweet and much needed.

Speaking of Ben, I just love him so much. I know, I'm Captain Obvious- but it's such an incredible and different feeling to be a mommy. He is mine (and Ryan's too!) and needs me and loves me unconditionally and laughs (a little so far) at his silly mommy. It's such a wonderful feeling and he totally lights up my life. I think I know the meaning of the song "You Are My Sunshine" on a whole different level now! I just love to look in his beautiful big blue eyes, I love the sounds he makes and how he breaths in my ear when I'm holding him on my shoulder or when he lays on my chest all snugly. Or the sounds he makes when he's sucking on his beloved binky (which I realize just about every picture of him on this entry he's sucking on it). I love his little pathetic cries he does. I love that he's starting to bald like an old man and even his little baby acne. I love how his warm little body feels when I hold him and calm him down when no one else can. I could go on... I guess I'll spare you.

(that's right!)

We got a video camera that records to an internal hard drive instead of a video tape so we can upload the video to the computer and burn DVD's. It's pretty cool. Here's a (kinda) long video of Ben hanging out on the floor almost turning over! It's probably not as cool to you... but oh well. This is really for mom, she misses the little guy a lot- so I figure this is as close to being able to see him often as you can get. So here you go mom! You can also hear his little grunts he makes. It's funny.

Ally got her hair cut... REALLY short. This is because her hair got badly matted underneath, so they had to shave her pretty close. I have to say though that she looks pretty stinkin' cute in those bows. And it's so much better to see her eyes, for some reason she's so much more annoying to me when I can't see her face well. Don't worry, we don't ever leave the bows in for long.

Before

After

I have a feeling these two are going to be pretty good friends. I love how he watches her, and she is already pretty protective of him. Ryan had the same kind of dog she is when he grew up and loved her SO much. I hope Ben has the same bond with Ally.

Other than that we're doing pretty good. We're getting the hang of this mom and dad thing, the nights aren't so bad and we have been blessed with a very easy going little kid. The weather has been beautiful and I'm just so happy its Spring.

Happy Birthday Alyssa! My niece is 10 today, I just can't believe it...I feel so old. She's such a good girl and I love her and miss her so much! The whole family is in Hawaii right now, what a way to spend a birthday huh? I think they are all very lucky and I hope we can get there someday! Have fun you guys!

I guess it's time to update. All is well. The days are getting shorter to when I have to go back to work. It's making me sad, I wont lie. It's going to be really hard. But I went to the daycare at my office complex where I'm going to be taking him, and it seems "good enough"... and it's close enough I can pop in whenever I want. Which I'm sure I'll do quite often. I took him in to visit my peeps at work too and everyone loved him, of course. It's hard not to! It felt like I hadn't been gone that long too while I was there... I thought 8 weeks would feel like forever, but it really hasn't.

Ben's getting bigger and bigger and heavier. He changes everyday but maybe just to us since we see him all the time. He's starting to smile a little here and there, and make his own little sounds besides crying. His temperament hasn't changed much either. He's tolerating diaper changes better now, and we gave him his first shower the other night and he seemed to like that better than the bath. Although he still cried, just not as much. He's still sleeping in our room in his little bassinet. I think until he gets a few more hours of sleep under his belt, we'll keep him in here. Other than last night, he's done really well sleeping at night. The night before last he slept an almost 7 hour stretch! That's great for us, I just get this guilty feeling for some reason that he's starving even though he's just fine. He wakes up when he's hungry, so I know I shouldn't worry about it. He's a grunter... he makes LOTS of noise when he's hungry. We're getting a video camera soon where you can upload it to your computer, so I'll take some video of it soon to show y'all. It's funny when I'm NOT trying to sleep... and annoying when he HAS eaten and we are trying to sleep. Oh well. :) He also was introduced to his little bouncy chair, it's been a little bit of a heaven sent so I don't have to pull his bassinet in the family room. He's starting to see things and pay attention to movement, so he likes the little animals that hang down and he also likes that his chair vibrates and plays different songs and sounds.

Ally has done really well with Ben. It used to freak her out when he'd cry- but now it's not big deal. She's starting to investigate him more and more now. But she doesn't seem competitive with him at all, and Delinda gives her PLENTY of attention.

It's just such a miracle to look at him everyday and know that I carried him for so long, and that we created life... it's a tad bit overwhelming at times to REALLY think about it. We are so blessed though, he's such a good baby and I know he has a special little spirit inside of him. You can see it in his beautiful wise eyes. I think he will do many good things in this life. Just like I feel about Ryan (on a different level of course) my love for Ben grows everyday.

Well, I finally got a new camera! Now I can do weddings and stuff again. I've really missed it and this camera is awesome. I just need to learn all the tricks and fun things about it!

On another note, Ryan's best friend Michael and his now wife Lori got married the weekend before last. We are SO happy for them, they looked so happy and I LOVED Lori's dress.

We are in the process of cleaning up our front yard. My dad and Ryan planted this little tree to watch it grow along side Ben. We call it "the Ben tree".

Okay, well- I'm going to go take a shower while my little man hangs out on the bed. He likes it on our comfy bed. I need to take advantage of him sleeping.

Just cuz he's the cutest thing EVER

We went to the doctor today for Ben's 1 month check up and he's now 8 lbs and has grown to a whopping 21 inches! He was such a good little dude for the doc and barely even cried, even when he was naked! I am so in love with this little man of mine, isn't he the cutest thing ever? Okay, so those of you who just had their own might think he's the second cutest thing- and that's okay! :)

video clips

These videos are for my brother John who specifically requested to see little Ben through video not just photos. I guess the rest of you can watch too... ha ha! I hope this works!

This one he was just hanging out on the bed next to me. Wide-eyed and super cute.

Here he is drinking his bottle. He makes this little sound every time he drinks and it's just too cute.

My parents left today, and although it was time for all of us- I will miss their company and help. It's all us now... we're official parents with technically no "on hand" help. They were so great to sacrifice so much time to be out here with us. We had clean dishes and laundry, we now have a "Ben tree" in the front yard and pretty flowers to look at... and most importantly my little guy got to spend some quality time with his Collier grandparents. They are so far away and so I am grateful that they got to meet him and for my mom to be here for his birth. I will forever be grateful to them for this time with them, as challenging as it was on occasion. Having 4-5 people in our somewhat small house all at once was a lot to cram in! I have great parents, and I'm SUPER lucky. Ben should NEVER doubt their love for him! He pretty much won them over big time!

Well, I guess it's time to update. Especially since the little one is asleep for now. Things have been going well. I am not resting as much as I should be or as much as I'm being told I should. Especially since my parents are still here and I should probably be taking advantage of that more. Although, I know that once Friday comes and they wont be here anymore, I'm on my own- so I'm kind of trying to prepare for that. I'm trying to get myself into some kind of routine with him and with being home all day long. It's starting to be a little weird to feel organized at home- I'm used to going to work and doing my thing there and being organized... being home was for days where I've just laid around because I've either been sick or needed a "me" day. That's not the case anymore. Or at least not for the next 5 weeks I've got to stay organized and active and on top of things.

Ben has been good about sleeping during the nights- we've really been pretty blessed with him and his demeanor. We've had quite a few4-5 hour stretches between feedings which has been nice since we are both pooped. I feed him as long as Ryan gets up to get the bottle and warm it up for me. The whole feeding routine takes about an hour total... and he'll usually fall asleep for a few minutes then wake up wanting more or he just hangs out and looks at you for a while until he decides he's still hungry. He's starting to get a little bit of an attitude and temper, but overall he's a really easy going baby. He's really Ryan's little mini-me in SO many ways! He really just doesn't like to be naked or to get his diaper changed and when he's hungry- you know it! He's really changing everyday and getting heavier and cheeks getting chubbier and I can't wait until the newborn glaze over the eyes goes away.

We took him on his first "outing" this weekend with my parents to Helen, GA. It was my mom's birthday and we needed to get her out of the house, and it was a really pretty day to do it. We first went to breakfast at one of our favorite breakfast places, The Original Pancake House and then drove up there about an hour and a 1/2 away. It was a REALLY pretty drive. Ben did really well the whole time until right before we were leaving to come home. He got hungry and mad that he'd been in his car seat the whole time. He had a little bit of a tantrum, but we got driving (as much as it killed me to sit there and listen to him cry his head off) and he finally calmed down.

We also took him to church for the first time this Sunday, and we made it through all three meetings just fine. He got a little fussy in Relief Society but he was just hungry again and we made it through just fine and with enough time to get him home and fed. We had Ryan's parents over that night for Easter dinner with everyone and it was really nice. It was such a beautiful Spring day, and each bloom reminded me of the Savior's resurrection. (Ryan's Parents)

So... all in all I am loving being a mommy. Things will feel and be a bit different when we're doing it ALL on our own, but each day I feel a stronger and stronger bond with the little dude. I love that he needs me, and when he's with other people sometimes he'll be fussy and when I get him he's fine. Makes me feel all important and stuff... like I'm his mommy or something! :) I had a neat experience with him yesterday while I was feeding him. He was unusually sociable for being hungry and kept looking at me and not eating and just listening to me talk. I told him that it was mine and daddy's 1 year anniversary and that meant that we could all go to the temple together. And that we would be sealed to each other so we could be together forever. At that moment, he smiled at me as if he knew (which I think he did) what I was talking about and it made him so happy and excited.

I just am so in love with my little man and could stare at him all day long. I am so excited to see more and more of his personality each day and love to see how he's different each day.

March 24, 2007- Happy Anniversary!

I love you Ryan!!!!

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Bath Time!

Ben had his first bath tonight to get ready for the arrival of his grandpa! He didn't like it ONE bit though! For someone who was naked for 9 months, he sure doesn't like being naked now! But oh my his hair was so cute afterwards- it totally fuzzed up and stuck up straight. It's really hard not to think he's cute though. Even if he is my kid!

Meeting Grandpa Collier for the first time!

Feliz Cumpleanos

Well Friday was my birthday... one year away from being 30. Which, for right now (this might change) I am okay with. To celebrate- my mom, my sister, Ben and I went to Olive Garden for lunch. It was our first time taking Ben out- besides to the doctor. It was good and Ben did really well, except for at the end he started getting hungry and a little fussy. But we made it home and fed him and he was happy.Then my sweet husband came home from work with flowers and a happy birthday balloon, that made my day! We left Ben with his grandma and auntie and we went to eat yummy food at Cheesecake Factory (one of our favorites). After dinner, we went on a walk in a nature preserve area right near the restaurant. We saw deer, a bunny and an owl. It was really cool, and relaxing. Unfortunately it was getting dark and rainy and so we headed home. Plus I was starting to miss Ben and we had cheesecake for everyone to eat as well. It was a great birthday- I love my man for taking me out and making me feel special. He is SO good to me, and patient and loving and understanding and I love him more now than I ever thought was possible!There were some pretty severe storms that blew through that night and more Saturday, one of which was a tornado in downtown Atlanta. There was some pretty bad damage done and luckily only a few people hurt and no one killed in the downtown tornado.Yesterday's storms got sort of scary because a couple tornadoes (of which there were like 4 or 5) hit close to us. And my sister was down at school when this one blew through- I believe it dissipated though before it did any damage. We were watching this on the news. Let me tell you- hearing the tornado sirens is a pretty scary thing. I was scared for a minute when our county went under the warning. We were and are safe though, and no one we know was hurt or affected luckily.


Ben is doing so good. His cheeks are getting fatter and fatter each day. His little personality shows here and there, and I'm learning more and more what it's like to be a mommy and how to take care of him. I think it's pretty instinctual, but there is still a lot to learn! I'm sure that part will never end!
He went over to his Nana & Poppy's house (Ryan's parents) for the first time today. He got pretty upset at the end because he was SO hungry and I didn't have another extra bottle to feed him because he had eaten it already! But luckily when we started driving he chilled out and we made it home with out him crying much anymore. It's such a miracle and wonderful thing to look at him and love him so much and know that my man and I created him. That he's OURS and that I got to carry him. I am loving watching him change everyday!

A week in the life of Ben

Okay, it's kind of long but here is a little montage of Ben-dome from conception until now! This is also for family and friends who don't get meet him right away as well.

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He's doing REALLY well by the way. He's a good baby. Doesn't like his diaper to be changed or his boy parts to get cold and cries bloody murder when this happens. But other than being hungry and that, he doesn't cry! (so far...)

Went to his first doc's appt yesterday and he's already 7 lbs! Mommy is tired, but that's to be expected. Speaking of tired, I'm going to bed! Hope you enjoy!

BEN IS HOME!!!!!

We have Ben at home now. They let him come home at 5 yesterday.

Ben Update

I guess I should let y'all know what's going on. Thank you SO much for the lovely comments on my sweet boy.
I was released from the hospital Wednesday (finally), but my little guy wasn't. I had a fever when Ben was delivered, and his breathing was a little fast so he had to go to the "transitional" nursery right after he was born to be monitored and to have some labs done. They finally brought him up to me about 4 hours after he was born, it was a LONG wait!
So then he had been having difficulties eating... which is fine, because he's new and needed to learn. But we had the lactation lady come in and help and we couldn't get him to latch on or if we did- he'd fall asleep. So I'd pump for 5 minutes before and then try and feed him and he still struggled. So we'd have to supplement him with a bottle. Tuesday night I was EXHAUSTED- the night before (which is the night I had him) I probably had only gotten three hours of sleep and after 11-12 hours of labor my little body couldn't function. So we decided to have the nurse take him to the nursery across the hall to feed him and hang out with him so we could get some sleep before we went home the next day. I'm glad we did because with in an hour of sending him in there- they noticed there was something wrong with his breathing which had been an issue right after he was born. So they sent him back down to the transition nursery. Which worried me to tears... he was there until about 9am the next morning and then was admitted to the NICU. He had three tests done and two out of three were fine- but the one that was a little elevated worried them, and he still wasn't eating very well or enough. Plus his breathing was pretty fast still. All of this on the day he was supposed to come home with us! Obviously that wasn't going to happen. Since then he's gotten so much better, he's out of NICU after only being there for a day. They were worried there for a second about his billirubin levels and they've gone down. His breathing problem subsided yesterday morning and the test that indicated infection was going down as well. He's been such a little trooper and I'm so proud of him and how much he's pulled through.
Yesterday my mom and I were able to go and see him for about 4 hours and spend some good time with him during two feedings. After I fed him the first time he stayed awake for about a 1/2 hour afterwards and let me just talk to him and sing and he never looked away. It was the most amazing feeling in the whole world. There was definitely a bonding moment there. I gave him a good pep talk and told him we needed him home... and that evening he started eating more than "required" and by the evening they had taken him off the strange table he'd been on for two days and put him in a regular bassinet and he looked just about ready to go home. They had even taken the feeding tubes out of him. Ryan and I went and held him for 2 hours last night and he was asleep the whole time. Couldn't get him to wake up! Anyway, we're hoping that he can come home today. I'm trying REALLY hard not to get my hopes up because this last week has kind of been a week of ups and downs and disappointments. But I just called and he was eating and the nurse said he did really well through the night. I am going to go get ready now and go see him before I have to take the special care CPR class before he can be released. I'll keep y'all posted. Prayers are needed! Thank you for them anyway!
Here are some pictures! I took some last night but can't find the cord to get them off the camera! AHH!